Here are some of the good things happening in my life:
So, my mom, who is managing persistent nicotine cravings, has gone cigarette-free for 7 months. Also, she and I have coffee almost every day outside, next to the garden I built for us—oh yea, we have a garden! Soon to be a farm.
I love a man and he loves me back. I believe everyday people have no idea what we’re missing until someone comes close enough to serve as a mirror and remind us of our true parts.
I have amazing, amazing friends. Last week, one of my dearest drove all the way from Philly to Baltimore in the pouring rain just to meet my family, play Pokeno and stay the weekend.
I made new friends at THINX—I call these things my power panties. THINX specializes in products for people with periods. *Greg Corbin voice* “I love myself!”
Also! Guess who’s producing? I mean this in the most remote, fundamental sense. I think it takes us so long to realize ideas because we’ve been tricked into thinking they’re important, like having to choose between the red wire or blue wire to keep from detonating a bomb.
Thoughts have no power except what we give them; the self is not the thought; it’s the observer of the thought. So it’s my pleasure to break it to you—ain’t nobody checkin'. Think, do, and let that shit go.
Jerry Seinfeld says it in a way I really enjoyed in an episode of, Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee, with Lewis Black: “if you think this is important, you're screwed before you write the first word." Bet.
It’s in our quiet time that we remember what our real voice sounds like, the one no one can hear but you. If I am having these thoughts, I have to believe I’m not the only one. So I say “we.” I think we’re evolving to a point where we ironically or maybe perfectly and naturally, are regressing back to our origin, away from brand, then a little bit further from reputation, and even further from our art, to remember what it’s like to be human again.
And even further again, we are creating space and perspective not in distancing ourselves outward from our humanness but going inward. Soul is who we really are. And it's in the quiet moment of awareness that we witness flickers of it, to hear inflections and whispers of our true voice.
I’m afraid to go back online. Back to the noise, visibility, movement…I feel like I’m only just beginning to hear myself again. Maybe even for the first time. I’m not sure.
When you're not sure where you are in the grand scheme of things, be here ; when you think you've lost sight of where you're going, get still; and when you feel like everything is happening and at the same time, nothing's happening--like you're running in place, make space. Make space and take inventory of your life.
I’m giving up on being so concerned with what form things take. We mustn’t wait until we find the right thing to say, or the right way to say it, before giving ourselves permission to speak.